UNR Students for Liberty » Absurd

Top Ten Reasons Gay Marriage Should Be Illegal

Barry Belmont — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 15:46:44 +0000

I found this over at StopGeek and I gotta say it’s pretty convincing…

Top Ten Reasons to Make Gay Marriage Illegal

1.) Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.

2.) Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

3.) Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

4.) Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all like many of the principles on which this great country was founded; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.

5.) Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of marriages like Britney Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.

6.) Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.

7.) Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

8.) Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.

9.) Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.

10.) Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

The Only Way I Know How to Understand the War in Iraq

Barry Belmont — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 07:05:16 +0000

National Debt by Country

Barry Belmont — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 05:50:34 +0000

‘Anarcho-Surrealism’ Wins in Iceland

Barry Belmont — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 07:02:04 +0000

This is taken from AllGov.com and describes a major victory for highlighting the utter ridiculousness of the elections of governments. It’s a wonderful testament to the profound absurdity that is associated with all States.

Comic Party Wins Iceland Election; Promises Disneyland at Airport, Transparent Corruption

Running on a platform described as “anarcho-surrealism,” Iceland’s Best Party (Besti Flokkurinn) is no longer just a big joke. The six-month-old party led by one of the nation’s best-known comedians, Jón Gnarr, won a stunning victory in the capital city of Reykjavik’s local elections, securing the largest percentage of votes (34.7%) and capturing six of the 15 seats on the city council.

The ruling coalition, consisting of the Social Democratic Alliance and the Left-Green Movement, fared poorly in the election, a likely result of voter unhappiness over an economy that was crippled by the 2008 financial crisis.

Analysts say Gnarr stands a good chance of becoming mayor of Reykjavik. He told the local media that people shouldn’t be alarmed by his party’s rise to power. “Nobody needs to be frightened of the Best Party because it’s the best. And we only want what is best—if we didn’t, we’d be called the Worst Party or the Bad Party.”

During the campaign Gnarr vowed, if elected, to add a polar bear to the city’s zoo and build a Disneyland near the airport, among other promises listed in his party’s music video, which claims that his is the “bestest of parties.” Gnarr has also promised “topnotch stuff as a general rule,” and “a drug-free parliament…by 2020.”

A couple of Gnarr’s other campaign promises:

“I want to become mayor, so that I can do a lot of good things…for my friends and relatives.”

“We want to abolish corruption…by doing our own corruption in plain sight.”

Apparently inspired by the amplifier in Spinal Tap, Gnarr stressed that “Every party has values. Most parties have five to ten values. But Besti Flokkurinn has twelve. This is because Besti Flokkurinn is the best party in everything.”

And how many Americans can relate to this appeal from the Best Party video: “All by yourself on Election Day, the ballot looking lifeless and a little gray, you have to choose. It’s all such a mess. Vote for us; we’re the best.”

Dear Gracie Pt. 3, Or; How to Remain Completely Oblivious Even After All This Time

Barry Belmont — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 18:57:04 +0000

Dear Gracie.

Against my better judgment, I still read what you write sometimes. Sometimes you write on my blog comment section, sometimes you write on the VisLupes comment section, sometimes you write on the Sagebrush. You know all this. You have a lot to comment on. A lot to say, really — important stuff, you think, stuff that needs to be said, why else would you say it? I make this tacit assumption each time I read your stuff, in fact I make it anytime I read anything: you feel you have something that the world needs to know. And so I read your stuff, knowing there’s a chase, wondering how I can cut to it.

Just a little bit ago you posted what you hoped would be your “last comment on any of these blogs” in response to one of the VislOops filing some judicial thingy, claiming that though you often agree in principle with what critics of ASUN have to say, you absolutely oppose them in practice. This is a shame because as you have spilled thousands and thousands of words onto the internet at folks like me and have had tens of thousands of words thrown right back at you (also by folks like me), it seems that you managed to not have taken anything away with you.

I guess this’ll have to be my last shot to convince you why much of what you believe is misguided — if not downright incorrect much of the time — and hopefully, hopefully, save you from having to get another one of these furious letters. Let’s not waste anymore time being cordial and get right down to the problem with your worldview.

To best understand the whole situation it is perhaps worthwhile to stress exactly what is going wrong with your thoughts. As I’ve commented on in the past, it is that you manage to always go tangent to the point being made, you have a terrible tendency to not address the subject at hand. I would like to be clear here: the problem — the reason for this letter — is that it is evident that you do not care even a little bit about how people espouse opinions. The problem is that you think it is okay to believe something in the face of evidence to the contrary. You ascribe, whether you think you do or not, to a form of confirmation bias wherein you do not take differing opinions seriously, to the point of being deaf to them entirely. Now, should you feel so inclined to respond to this letter, I urge you to respond to that thesis statement, as all that follows is simply evidence in favor of that proposition.

For instance, here, in beautiful, unadorned language is your obliviousness distilled into a single sentence, the context of which is you commenting upon the actions of people like UNR SFL and the VisLupes: “if you’re ultimate goal was to prove that the advisors are not doing their job and ensuring that ASUN is responsible and accountable for their actions, which I’ve sensed is your goal, then I couldn’t agree more.” If you don’t see anything wrong with this at all then perhaps this will help. Follow the logic.

1.) “If you’re ultimate goal was to prove that”

Improper contraction use aside, why would you assume this is our ultimate goal? Have I not made it abundantly clear that the abolishment of ASUN is my goal, that returning the mandatory fees to students the step after that? What makes you think that even that piddly goal is what could even come close to being an “ultimate” goal? How about abolish the real government? How about instituting free and open markets? Heck, getting Taco Bell ranks higher on my List of Ultimate Goals than does getting rid of your sad, sorry institution. You have to realize, dear Gracie, that the world doesn’t care about the ASUN. In fact, it appears that only about, what, 15% of the students of this university even mildly care. Due to the high proportion of those that don’t care about the ASUN (consider that Kenyans, the French, the Dallas Cowboys, etc, do not give one single damn about it), it is safe to say that NO ONE CARES about the ASUN. Not even me, dear reader.

2.) “the advisors are not doing their job”

No, Gracie. No no no no. You poor girl. We aren’t mad at “advisors.” We aren’t up in arms about bureaucrats when we’re insulting you. We are insulting YOU, Gracie. YOU and the SENATE. The advisors are bureaucratic hacks who follow bureaucratic principles. Yes, this is bad. Yes, they have no incentive to better the institution around them. Yes, they are partly responsible for what goes on in ASUN. BUT NO, NO, NO, Gracie, we are mad at YOU. You, as a person who claims to represent student interests. You, as the leader of the the student senate. You, as a person who received 7,000 unjustified clams of student funds. You, as a person who supports ASUN’s fees and programs and ideas and principles. You, Gracie, are what we are mad at. You who would pretend that it is not YOUR job to ensure ASUN is responsible, who would pretend it is not YOUR job to ensure ASUN is accountable, who would pretend that the ASUN can be anything but an inherently flawed system that only benefits and whose only input is to and from a small minority of students.

3.) “and ensuring that ASUN is responsible and accountable for their actions,”

Your ability to pass The Buck and Spread the Blame is astounding. Having followed what you’ve had to say for these past years, it never ceases to amaze me how you can think of yourself as so very innocent and free of sin. I believe I once remarked that “you play yourself as an unknowing victim.” It boggles my mind — being a believer in personal responsibility as I am — that you can think you are blameless. Utterly and entirely blameless. You may be the only person I know who manages to overwhelm with your declarations of underachievement. But, Gracie, when you convey a point in an open area of discourse, there are those that will disagree with you. This applies to the actions of which you partake as well: by participating in and supporting the functions of the ASUN, you are declaring a position which many, including myself, find wrong. The ASUN is a sorry excuse for an institution, especially one that claims to be the voice of students and to be doing so much good for them. Now, I’ve made the case elsewhere that this is wrong. Since it is wrong, you are wrong to support it. You can’t just take praise for the good stuff and say the bad stuff is due to Not-Me-A, Not-Me-B, and so forth. Hence, when I say something like “Gracie is wrong,” it isn’t a personal attack, it’s a claim about the world, namely that, You support a system which should not be supported.

4. “which I’ve sensed is your goal, then I couldn’t agree more.”

This conclusion falls so short of the truth that it is practically not worth bothering with. If A, B, C, then I couldn’t agree more. But no one posited A, B, or C. If unicorns are hollow, and if hollow things are filled with helium, and if things with helium float, then I agree that unicorns can float. But, sorry to break it to you, unicorns can’t float. Gracie, your internal logic may be consistent, maybe even tip-top, but how it applies to the external world is anyone’s guess. I hope you’ve gotten the point of all of this: what you believe must correspond to the reality of the world around us. Since what you believe currently does not do this, you are wrong on many many important accounts.

And that’s just the first sentence!

Now, I could bog you down with refuting the silly assertion that you believe how something is said makes any difference as to the truth or falsity of a position, but I think that maybe I would be making a straw-woman of you. Your only critique of the UNR Students for Liberty is that when we say something, we tend to yell it, and no one likes yelling, and no one wants to work with someone who is yelling, and aren’t they all just a bunch of meany-heads? Your critique of our position is that we are “assholes” and your biggest complaint about our methods is that they aren’t “diplomatic.” But this is just pathetic nonsense. Who cares about any of that stuff, indeed as I asked of you last time, qui gives a shit?

I don’t think you actually care about how mean we are as much as you feign to. No. I give you more credit than that. What I think you have a problem with is that you sense, however dimly, that we are right. That these assholes, these jerks, these douchebags may have something behind them in the way of reasoning and evidence and that maybe, just maybe, they are right when they criticize your opinion. After all, what exactly is incorrect about believing that people shouldn’t be forced to do things they don’t want to do? What is incorrect about believing that people shouldn’t be governed by those in an institution that is unsupported by the vast majority? What is incorrect in thinking that political opinions to the contrary are wrong?

Gracie, the UNR Students for Liberty are a silly bunch. They couch cogent philosophical points within immature Dear Gracie posts, they make political economy points by renting ponies! You can dismiss us as children, but it’s akin to being the Santa at Macy’s getting mad at the child who pulls off his beard and says “Look, he’s not Santa!” You were the Santa of the ASUN and we childishly ripped off your beard. But in getting mad at us you’re forgetting one important fact [Spoiler warning]: THERE IS NO SANTA.

Your frustration with us stems from the fact that you keep missing the point, Gracie. It’s not that we want to show that you, personally, are not Santa, but rather to show that there is no Santa, that the ASUN is not the North Pole and that it never can be. There is nothing wrong with there being no Santa, no North Pole. What is wrong is to continue to pretend that there is even in the face of evidence to the contrary. What is wrong is thinking that it is okay to believe something on insufficient evidence.

Love always,
Barry

Racism and Comedy, Or; How to Make a Point

Barry Belmont — Wed, 24 Feb 2010 23:33:20 +0000

How is the “debate” about the supposedly “racist” skit done by a comedy troupe here in Reno even still an issue? No person involved is a racist. It seems that no person involved has been offended. No one cares. This. Shouldn’t. Be. An. Issue. But it seems to be and to prove a point I’m going to take the issue and crank it up to 11 as only a member of the UNR Students for Liberty can.

You see, there is actually no such thing as race. It is biologically irrelevant and civilly divisive. And even though the comedy troupe doesn’t appear to have been trying to make fun of race, maybe they should have. In fact, maybe I should. Below are a bunch of funny things about race — none of which are “offensive” in any meaningful respect.

If you choose to be offended by any of this you need to do two things: 1) Grow up. We’re adults, we should be able to talk about all issues with a sense of level-headed maturity. 2) Dash your misplaced sense of superiority against the rocks. Yes, these things are childish, but they’re also pretty funny. So crack a smile, while discovering that “race” really has no place in today’s society.

…And just to drive the point home, this is what blackface looks like:

…there’s nothing scary about it. It’s just some guy with shoe polish on his face. He isn’t unraveling the fabric of society. He isn’t destroying hearts and shattering minds. This picture, old timey, faded, black and white, is literally the epitome of absurdity in race relations.

It’s just a guy with shoe polish on his face.

Maybe This’ll Help You Understand Credit Schemes.

Barry Belmont — Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:22:34 +0000

Most fiscally responsible people know that relying on “credit” is a dubious sort of thing to do. It leads to overspending, underutilizing, and it tends to promote living beyond one’s means. To summarize the financial crisis in a word: Credit. People borrowed on credit, loaned on credit, lived on credit. Maybe this’ll help you understand how bad credit schemes are.

Let The Signs Decide: Charlie Jose 1

Barry Belmont — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 01:51:54 +0000

Our recent post on the vandalization of an ASUN sign has inspired us to make a series of it. Sure, why not? We shouldn’t just single out one individual after all: there’s plenty of fodder to go around.

As you read begin to read these, keep this in mind: We are not offering constructive criticism. We’re not attempting to get people to change their stance on issues and nor do we care about their policies. These posts are just light-hearted attempts at mockery. ASUN elections are absurd. We take no position but that one. Please note that if you see your sign up here, we are not insinuating that you are a bad person, aren’t qualified, or anything that could be construed as negative. You’re all probably great and wonderful people. We just think it’s funny. We hope you do too.

Charlie Jose (President):

“Our” in this sense that I am forced to seed power to ASUN hacks and the people who vote for them. Exactly how can it be my university if I don’t support what you do for it? Hell, I don’t even support the idea of voting. And this face thing is going to be one creepy motif…yeah, I know you were the first, but still…creeps me out to see all these giant faces watching me go to class…like something out of the Twilight Zone. But mostly, how can I support someone with such a terrible choice in color.

Abolish ASUN Event Logistics (Campus Procedures Only)

John Russell — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 20:00:35 +0000

It is events such as this which require clubs to have a dedicated bureaucracy infiltrator position in order to appease our bureaucrats. Below is a quick procedure flowchart I whipped together which will be performed by various members in our club in order to put on our Abolish ASUN Event within policy. With forms like this to just bring a damn pony on campus, is it any wonder why clubs digress to just ordering pizza? (Note – this flowchart only includes steps we have to/had to take in order to satisfy the school. This does not include all the preparation steps taken to make it a success)

Hey ASUN… are you still wondering why students don’t get involved? (Click on the image for a PDF version)

SFL Secures Nearly Four Grand to Abolish ASUN… Courtesy of ASUN

John Russell — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 19:34:29 +0000

Tune in to nearly 7 minutes of awkward silence as the commission ultimately decides to sponsor our Abolish ASUN festival. Some items of interest include: ponies, horses, bounce houses, a mechanical bull, JCSU staff, pizza oh my! Oh, and who can forget the 13 foot banner which will read: ABOLISH ASUN FESTIVAL (Sponsored by ASUN)? Be sure to catch this event on the TV screens around campus in the weeks to come as we were mandated to use Inkblot (the official ASUN event publicists)! Enjoy!

(Note: apparently the beginning part of the request was not captured where Barry Belmont (President ’08 – ’09) and Mary Hunton (President – current) described to the commission why we wanted to abolish them :/ … it is still funny nonetheless)